Goals
As we continue going through this Worthy book, a lot of things have come up- things that I've never thought about before, new perspectives, and sometimes things I think about all the time. Something that came up recently in our readings is God's goal(s) for us versus our goal (s) for ourselves. What's the difference between them and how do we get them to line up? How do we know what's right and wrong, and how do we know what God really wants for us versus what we really want for ourselves. I think going through life especially as we age, it's one of the things that our society teaches us that we have to have these certain goals as we grow up. We have to do well in school. We have to have a career and it all has to be perfect. We have to have a family. We have to be married.. whatever society is telling us at that moment. But we have to do it no matter what . And then I think we get into this cycle of trying to figure out the perfect thing to do or the perfect family to have or the perfect husband to have or the perfect house to live in. And then when we grow up a little bit more than we're trying to differentiate between what we want for ourselves, which sometimes we still don't even know, versus what God wants for us. And then how do we figure that out? How do we know what God wants us for us? I remember when I first got sober and I was desperately trying to figure out what God wanted for me to do and the consensus was that whatever I wanted to do was probably not what God wanted me to do. Just because at that point I was still so selfish and self-centered and in this old way of doing and thinking and was still trying to turn my perspective and my life around. Not just with my drinking but with everything that's between my ears. But then growing up staying sober one day at a time. So then more things happen with my life and I'm still trying to figure that out one day at a time. And I think that's a thing that so many people are trying to figure out. I feel like I've talked to so many friends that even though they are doing so well in life, they just still don't know exactly what they're supposed to be doing and asking God constantly if this is what he wants them to be doing? And then waiting for an answer that may never come. I've been there. I can still get there at times. And then sometimes you just got to DO. Make up your mind. Change your mind whatever it is but just DO. For me, I know as long as I'm not drinking today, as long as I'm trying to change and do better for myself, as long as I'm trying to serve someone else and get out of myself , as long as I'm trying to grow, trying to be less selfish, trying to do all the things (which the list can go on and on and seem so overwhelming at times). But if I keep trying then maybe that's just what I need to be doing. Maybe God (whatever that God is to you) is just pleased with me anyways even though it's not perfect or it's not exactly the way we think He wants it to be. Because in reality God has all this planned out for us anyways, I think. We're just living in this movie and He's watching it and only He knows exactly how it's going to go and I think He's proud no matter what.